Thoughts

Those moments when you realize you have great friends, that you matter to people, that you are in someone else's thoughts.  Those are the moments to live for.  Those are the moments I hold on to and cherish.

I got a text a few days ago from my old roommate who got married this summer (her husband was basically our 5th roommate because he was over so often and we loved him) and she invited me over (for tonight) to their new apartment for dinner.  It was so unexpected and so wonderful.  It is the best feeling in the world to be thought of when you go along with your life having the impression that no one is really thinking about you and what you are doing.  It's a great feeling that lasts.

I honestly don't know why my sentimental side has been exploding out of me for the past few days.  All I can say is that since Saturday morning my thoughts have been preoccupied with the ideas of life in the present and future.  Maybe I am not living my life to its fullest right now? (Actually, I know I'm not.) Or maybe I need to be preparing better for my future?  Whatever the reason, I cannot shake this overwhelming thought that I need to figure it out, whatever "it" may be.  I am not having the college experience that I imagined as a young teenager, and I know that that is my fault, entirely.  But these few days I have come to the conclusion that my past (even the very recent past) doesn't matter because it is gone.  I need to work harder to be a person and not just a student, a best friend and not just a roommate.

It's tough, but I know it's possible.  I've seen it.  I see it every day.  I envy it now, but tomorrow I can become it.

Look for the sunshine and don't stop till you find it.

<3 Mel