Inspiration Schminspiration

Cleverness and talent astound me.  Astound me! It isn't fair that people in this world have these abilities and I am utterly incapable.

Heather Dixon is my new envy of the week.  This happens every time we're asked to "be familiar with" a guest speaker's work the night before they come for a visit to our Engl 220 class. It's not right, I tell you.

Inspiration? Is that what these people are supposed to be?  Because they surely are.  In a big way.  But the inspiration and spinning wheels of ideas last only as long as it takes me to write one sentence, or snap one photo, or attempt one illustration.  Then the spark is gone.  These people are too good.  Ugh.

At the same time, though, I feel this need to discover my own passion, my own talent that I can be good at.  Not better than other people (there will always be someone better, I've learned).  But good in my own way, because it comes from me.

And then I lose it again.  What can I think up that hasn't already been put out there?  What can I invent?

This ramble, believe it or not, connects with my personal history project (due in December. . . yikes!) and how I have been struggling to think of something that will not only fulfill the assignment requirements but will  allow me to enjoy myself!  It's tough, I'm telling you.

So as I was nearly screeching with laughter or ooohing and aaahing through every single one of Heather Nixon's blog posts, I started devising ideas.  How 'bout I draw (using stick figures, of course. . . duh) something that happened to me each day! Yup, that idea went away fast.  Even drawing stick figures is daunting to me.  (How in the world do you make them use their hands? They don't have any hands!)

So then I thought: All righty, Melanie.  What are your passions? What do you love?
I came up with 'movies'.  Yup, movies.  And it's true — I love to watch movies so very much.  I love clever, well-written scripts and how they toy with one's emotions.  I love watching stories unfold and distinguishing the particular choices of the writer/director/producer/cinematographer. I also love the history behind the emergence of filmmaking and how movies pertain to their time periods. (Oh lookey here, I'm getting all passionate and worked up!)

Lightbulb (*blink blink*) went off in my head.  What if I write my personal history as a series of movies that I have seen?  I start with the first movie I can remember and put (as best I can) the movies I've seen, in order, as I've grown up.  And of course I will talk about them, how I perceived them at the time, how I perceive them now, what was going on in my life at the time that I watched that movie, etc. etc.

Would that work??

Ahh I'm so excited! I want to get started and see if it will pan out.  What do you think?  Would you read that? (And I'd put in pictures and video clips and such. . . this is so exciting!)

I could call it "Mel's Drive In", after this deliciously awesome place in Hollywood.
Do you get it? Drive-in movies? Mel? That's me. :)

Well.  So it goes.

Have I found the sunshine?

<3 Mel